


I'd Walk Through Infinite Worlds

by AndiinaRaethTash



Series: When All We Had Was Eternity [6]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Episode: s04e10 Jedi Night, Episode: s04e11 DUME, Episode: s04e13 A World Between Worlds, F/M, Gen, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-28 19:13:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19818751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndiinaRaethTash/pseuds/AndiinaRaethTash
Summary: Resolve: a resolution or determination made, as to follow some course of action.No matter how bright the dawn or how dark the day, nightfall is inevitable.





	1. Rescue

**Author's Note:**

> This actually started out as another chapter of And the Space You Leave Behind. Then, about 3000 words in I realized that 1) it didn't really fit the rest of that part of the series and 2) it was already 3000 words long and only halfway done. So it became another part of the series.

Kanan had been dreading this mission. It had been the one he’d known was coming, but hadn’t been able to do anything about. The moment they realized it was needed, he and Ezra had shared a look but had said nothing, mentally preparing for what lay ahead. 

As the others prepared the gliders for the mission, Kanan pulled Ezra aside. He didn’t say anything about how the mission would end, he just gestured to the ground and pressed the idea of  _ kneel _ across their bond. Ezra did so, looking slightly confused, before realization dawned on his face as Kanan drew his lightsaber and held it to Ezra’s shoulder.

“By the right of the Council, by the will of the Force,” Kanan said softly, “Ezra Bridger. You may rise.”

Ezra climbed shakily to his feet, looking at Kanan with a clear question on his face. Kanan sighed as he clipped his lightsaber back to his belt. “Just in case.”

Ezra nodded, then surprised Kanan by tackling him in a hug. “Just in case,” he whispered into Kanan’s shirt, and Kanan wrapped his arms tightly around him.

“I’m proud of you,” Kanan said, trying to blink away the tears that had sprung to his eyes.

Ezra just buried his face harder into Kanan’s chest. “I love you, Dad.”

“Love you, too, kiddo.” Kanan gently pulled away, giving Ezra a watery smile. “Let’s go get Hera.”

As Ezra clambered onto the glider behind him, Kanan took the opportunity to glance back at Zeb and Chopper, carefully memorizing their already familiar features. Zeb was tense in eager anticipation. He didn’t know how badly this mission was going to turn out, how badly it needed to turn out for the movement to free Lothal to succeed. Chopper was rolling about, checking to make sure that everything was in place, chirping at Sabine and Ezra, reminding them of everything they needed to do to get Mom back. Sabine replied in an annoyed tone that they knew the mission, while Ezra was suspiciously quiet.

Kanan glanced back at his student, who had elected not to wear his mask or hood for this mission. He was staring away from the camp, towards Capital City, where Hera was waiting for rescue.

Where Kanan would have to say goodbye to the rest of the crew of the  _ Ghost _ .

As dread coiled in his belly, Ezra’s sightless eyes snapped over to meet his. Ezra didn’t say anything, but he sent a wave of reassurance over their bond. Kanan let it wash over him, relaxing slightly as he sent Ezra a smile, despite the fact that he couldn’t see it.

Zeb walked over, grabbing the line and handing it to Chopper, who hopped onto the speeder bike and locked himself down on it. As Zeb went to sit down on the speeder, though, Ezra called out, “Hey, Zeb?” When the Lasat turned back, Ezra sent him a reassuring smile. “We’ll get her back. I promise.”

Zeb laughed, even though his worry was palpable in the Force. “‘Course you will, kid. If we can rescue Kanan from a Star Destroyer with an Inquisitor on our tails, we can get Hera out of an Imperial complex guarded by Stormtroopers.”

Ezra didn’t say anything back, just nodded and readjusted his grip on the glider. Kanan watched him carefully, not sure he liked Ezra’s tone. But then Zeb was starting the speeder’s engine, and as the gliders slowly began to take to the sky, Kanan forced it out of his mind, and instead settled it for what was to come. 

**_______**

He’d forgotten how funny Hera was when drugged. At least this time he didn’t have a haircut for her to make fun off. But as he handed her her kalikori, and she griped at him because it was  _ hers,  _ and therefore couldn’t be a present, he had to suppress a laugh. Instead, he smiled gently, and, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, guided her out the window so she could scale up to the platform they’d landed on.

After that, he zoned out slightly, moving on autopilot. He’d spent the last several days running over his memories of this mission, determining what he could change, what would have already changed, and he knew what would happen next.

Ruhk attacked. Kanan left his lightsaber behind as Hera piloted a glider to the fuel depot with him awkwardly clinging on. He let Sabine know about the change of plans. Ezra already knew, had probably been obsessing about what he could change just as much, if not more than Kanan had been. He knew what was about to happen, probably better than Kanan did, if only because he’d lived through the aftermath.

It was only when they clambered to the top of the fuel tank that things changed. Hera had already told him how she felt; they’d gotten married after he, Ezra, and Sabine had returned from Mandalore, and they’d officially adopted both of the teens. So there would be no dramatic, last minute confession. He already knew. He also knew that, just like at this point last time around, Hera was pregnant. Instead, he just held her to his chest as they waited for the kids to arrive.

When they did, Sabine waved to them cheerfully from the cockpit before swinging around to show Ezra standing in the back, still in his pilot’s uniform, but with the hood pushed back so his long hair was whipping about in the wind. With a grin that didn’t quite reach his eyes, Ezra hopped down and hugged Hera, glancing quickly at Kanan.

“Glad you’re safe, Mom,” he said softly, before turning and helping Kanan lift her into the waiting transport.

As they did, Kanan felt his heart pounding in his chest as the dread that had been building all night reached a crescendo. It wasn’t until a second too late that he realized it wasn’t just his fear screaming at him, though, and he turned in time to see Ezra surge forward, arms raised to hold off the oncoming wave of fire.

_ “ Ezra _ _!”_ He screamed, managing two steps forward before Ezra reached back with one hand and grabbed him with the Force. Kanan was suspended in the air, watching his student-- his  _ son _ \-- hold off the impending death that was supposed to be  _ his _ . Slowly, Ezra turned to face him, his blue hair whipping in the wind around his face as the fire roared behind him. He met Kanan’s eyes almost reluctantly, and Kanan could only watch, mouth and eyes open wide in horror, as the fog that had clouded Ezra’s beautiful blue eyes since Malachor finally lifted, and Kanan understood.

This had been Ezra’s plan all along. He was never planning on letting this unfold the way it had last time. He knew, before they left, before they put the finishing touches on the plan, before Hera had even gone down, that it would be him dying in Kanan’s place.

And every single part of Kanan’s mind, body, and heart screamed in sheer denial. 

He tried to reach forward, to take the brunt of the impending explosion himself, but Ezra chose that moment to shove him back into the ship, into Hera’s waiting arms. That didn’t stop Kanan from trying to reach out again, but Ezra stopped him again, this time by speaking through their Force bond. ‘ _ It’s okay,’  _ he said. ‘ _ Dad, it’s okay. Just let me go.’ _

Then Ezra gathered the Force, glanced over Kanan’s shoulder to meet Hera’s eyes, and  _ shoved _ the transport away.

Kanan was aware of screaming-- maybe his, maybe Hera’s or Sabine’s, it didn’t really matter-- and he knew that the transport was riding the shockwave of the explosion that had finally consumed the fuel depot as Ezra relinquished his hold on it. But all he could focus on was the figure of his son vanishing as the flames closed around him, and the feeling of the bond between them, which had only grown in strength since Malachor, disappearing once again.

** _______ **

Coming back to camp was hard. Watching Sabine explain to Zeb, between angry yells and heartbroken sobs, what she meant by “Ezra’s gone,” was even harder. But watching Hera clutch her kalikori to her chest as she silently let the tears flow down her face, made him want to scream and rage and hit something, but that wouldn’t do anything. 

It wouldn’t bring Ezra back.

Gently, he wrapped his arms around Hera’s shoulders, drawing her in so that she was resting her head against his chest, similar to how he’d been holding her before the transport had shown up. How he’d held her before they left for Malachor. Both times he thought it would be him that was injured or killed, but both times Ezra-- kind-hearted, brave, self-sacrificing Ezra-- had been the one to pay the price instead. And it wasn’t  _ fair. _

Ezra had had his whole life ahead of him. He hadn’t known what it was like to fall in love, to live in a galaxy that wasn’t at war, to have a little sibling to play with and tease. He’d just been a kid. His kid.

** _______ **

Later that night, as he and Hera sat next to each other in the base, Kanan finally spoke the thought that had been sitting in his head. “There’s a name for a child who loses his parents.  _ Orphan _ . But there’s no name for a parent who loses a child. There just… there aren’t words.”

Hera nodded slowly. “When we lost him last time… when we got him back, I promised myself I’d never let him go.” She met Kanan’s eyes, her own red and glassy from tears, both shed and unshed. “Never,” she repeated, and Kanan pulled her into his lap and held her as she sobbed. A few tears streamed silently down his face, too, but he couldn’t seem to conjure the sobs that had come so quickly after Malachor. He’d built up a wall to keep the ache in his heart away, not wanting to feel this god-awful  _ pain  _ that ripped through him whenever he let his emotions through.

After several minutes, she straightened slightly and pulled away enough from Kanan to meet his eyes, her own wide with shock. “Oh, Force, he didn’t know-- I never got to tell him--”

Kanan rubbed her back soothingly. “He knew. He knew, Hera.”

“No, Kanan,” she protested, thinking he didn’t understand. “He didn’t-- I- I’m--”

Kanan cut her off again. “I know,” he said, his voice breaking. “And so did he.”

That was when the wall shattered. And he sobbed.


	2. Recovery

The next day the Loth-wolves found him. The next day, Zeb and Sabine got back from blowing something up. The next day, Hera added another piece to her kalikori, for the son she’d lost. The next day, he brought a stone back to base with engravings on it, knowing it was going to lead to one of the last missions before they drove the Empire off of Lothal.

Opening himself up to the Force enough to activate the Daughter hurt. He was so used to Ezra’s presence that the gaping absence of it felt like a knife to his heart. But he had to press on. He had to…

As he stumbled into the World Between Worlds, though, marveling at the endless expanse, he wondered what exactly he could fix here. Ahsoka was still alive, on the Rebel base on Yavin 4. He couldn’t very well pull Ephraim and Mira out of the moment of their deaths. Ephraim had piloted the carrier into the Interdictor, and if he was pulled out… Meanwhile, Mira had taken a blasterbolt for Ezra, and if he’d died then, then Kanan wouldn’t be here to save them.

Growling, he rubbed his forehead. He  _ hated  _ time-travel. Paradoxes gave him headaches.

It was as he was debating just leaving and collapsing the Temple the way Ezra had described that he heard a hoot. Looking up, he was startled but not overly surprised to see the white and green convor that had accompanied Ahsoka sitting above the portal he’d entered through.

“What?” He asked-- well, demanded, really-- before remembering what Ezra had said had happened last time. If the convor had guided Ezra to Ahsoka, maybe… “Can you show me what I’m supposed to change here?” He asked, a bit more politely this time.

The convor hooted, then took off. Kanan chased it along the winding walkways, trying to ignore the voices-- some familiar, some not-- and focus on following the little bird through this strange world. 

There was nothing immediately special about the one the convor chose to alight on. It was a simple circle, with a concentric ring around it. It was as he drew closer that Kanan felt something on the other side of this portal tugging at him, in a way that was familiar and yet completely impossible. The darkness within the portal shifted as the inner ring lit up, and suddenly he was staring at an intensely familiar scene, one he’d seen in his nightmares for years.

“Caleb, go! I’ll be right behind you!” Master Billaba’s voice rang out, and Kanan flinched when the sound of blaster fire followed it. He heard a young voice-- his voice-- protest, only to be drowned out by Depa screaming, “ _ Run! _ ” 

As the blasterfire intensified, Depa stepped back into view, and Kanan had to watch as she blocked shot after shot until she was too slow to stop one of them and she fell to her knees with a cry, dropping her ‘saber. The clones stepped forward, raising their blasters, and Kanan couldn’t watch. He couldn’t stand around as his Master was gunned down in front of him. Again.

So he acted.

He didn’t even think about it, but as the troopers squeezed their triggers and the bolts flew through the air, he reached out, grabbed her, and pulled her back and out of the line of fire. The shockwave of the two exiting the portal sent both of them tumbling, and Kanan clutched his head as a decades-old bond snapped back to life in his mind.

After taking a moment to recenter himself, Kanan pulled himself up to his elbows so he could stare at the Jedi Master lying not five feet from him.

Depa was breathing hard, clutching her side where the blasterbolt had struck home. Her torn and dirty robes were pooled around her, and her normally very neat hair was in disarray, but by the Force, she was alive, and in that instant, that was all Kanan cared about.

He rose shakily to his feet, and Depa’s attention snapped to him. As she carefully stood, she eyed him warily, obviously suspicious of the stranger in what looked like clone trooper armor who was staring at her like he’d seen a ghost.

After a moment of awkward silence as the two stared at each other, Depa asked in a shaky voice, “Who are you? Where am I? And where’s Caleb?”

Kanan blinked at the sound of her voice, before stammering an answer. “I’m Kanan, Kanan Jarrus. We’re in-- well, it’s a long story and not one I’m sure you’ll believe. And, um, well…”

As he tried to think of a good answer to her last question, Depa raised an eyebrow, unconsciously reaching for where her lightsaber normally hung on her belt. Kanan was almost glad it wasn’t there, because if Master Depa Billaba returned from the dead just to skewer him with her lightsaber, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to take the irony.

Finally, he settled on, “Caleb got away. He survived,” to answer Depa’s question.

She relaxed marginally, but still narrowed her eyes at him. “What happened? Why did they turn on us, and how did we get here?”

“They had chips in their brains.” Kanan answered quickly. “Planted in there when they were growing, preprogrammed with orders to terminate the Jedi when the Supreme Commander of the GAR gave the order. None of them wanted to do it, they just didn’t have a choice. The, um, second question is a bit more… complicated.”

“That is often an excuse to avoid uncomfortable answers. Explain how we got here, where  _ here _ is, and what happened in more detail, or I will assume you are an enemy.”

Kanan gritted his teeth. “Fine. As far as I know, I managed to pull you out of the moment of your death, which was about eighteen years ago. Congratulations, you’re now one of the few people who can honestly say they’ve time-traveled.”

She gaped at him for a minute before saying, “You’re telling the truth.”

Kanan nodded. “It gets weirder, trust me. The Chancellor, the aforementioned Supreme Commander of the GAR? He’s a Sith. The day he issued Order 66, the day I just pulled you out of, he declared the Jedi criminals and proclaimed himself Emperor. Those of us who survived went into hiding, but a few have since come out into the open and started to fight. There’s a small Alliance, a Rebellion that’s trying to free the galaxy from his rule. That’s why I’m here, actually. Me and my crew are trying to free Lothal from the Empire. The door to this place was in the Jedi Temple there, and the Empire had gotten nosy around it, so we figured we’d better see what they were up to.”

He honestly wasn’t sure how much of that Depa had retained. She’d looked so confused when he’d outed Palpatine for what he was, then so sad when he’d mentioned survivors, and so lost by the time he’d gotten to the Temple. 

Still, she must have been paying attention, because she met his eyes and asked, “You’re a Jedi?”

Kanan mentally cursed himself for letting that slip, but nodded. “Yeah, I’m a Jedi Knight.”

She pressed her lips together. “I don’t recall anyone in the Order with your name.” When he didn’t offer an explanation, she sighed. “How many survived?”

Kanan bit his lip. Tell her the truth, or offer a vague but slightly dishonest answer? She’d probably sense the lie, so truth it was. “Fi- four, now, that I know of. Not including you.”

Depa’s eyes widened in shock. “Only four…? Who?”

“Master Yoda, Master Kenobi, Ahsoka Tano, and myself.” He answered reluctantly.

She closed her eyes as she absorbed the information, then frowned in confusion and opened them. “You said Caleb survived.”

“He did.” Kanan didn’t offer any further explanation, letting her draw her own conclusion. She studied him carefully, watching his every twitch. Finally, she met his eyes for a long moment and seemed to find her answer. Her hand flew to cover her mouth.

“Caleb?” She gasped, and Kanan let a small smile play across his face.

“I haven’t gone by that name in years.” At Depa’s silent question, he added, “The Empire knew that name. In order to survive, I had to leave it and the Jedi behind. I had to do some things to stay alive that I’m not proud of, but if I hadn’t I would have been caught and killed.”

“But you’re a Knight now.” Depa said, confused, and Kanan nodded.

“Yeah, you can thank my crew for that. Hera keeps my head on right, Zeb watches my back, Sabine keeps me steady, and Ezra--” His voice suddenly broke, grief washing through him again like a tidal wave. “Ezra made me remember what it meant to be a Jedi.”

Depa noticed the break in his voice, sensed his grief through the Force. “Ezra is…?”

“My Padawan,” Kanan answered without meeting her eyes. “And dead.”

“Oh, Caleb…” But whatever she was going to say next was cut off by a hoot.

The convor that had led him to Depa swooped down to land on his shoulder, gripping it tightly even through the pauldron of the stormtrooper uniform he was wearing. Kanan had honestly forgotten it was here until it had hooted, and as he reached up to gently stroke it, he smiled. “Thank you,” He whispered to the little bird, then jumped slightly as it hooted again and took off.

Depa watched it go with confusion. “Should we…?”

“Follow it.” Kanan confirmed before taking off down the walkway after the convor. He had no clue where it was leading this time, either. Maybe to the exit, or maybe to someone else he could save, although he couldn't think of anyone else he could save without fundamentally changing things. As it was, he wasn’t sure how he’d gotten away with saving Depa.

The convor came to a halt atop another portal, this one obviously not the one he’d entered through. As the convor chirped at him, though, he felt something call to him from deep within the portal. As he neared it, with Depa just behind him, the darkness of the portal turned to fiery red, and he was greeted with a scene he’d hoped he’d never have to relive.

As fire spread across the scene, Ezra leaped forward, holding his hands out in front of him as he called up a shield with the Force. Dimly, Kanan heard himself scream, “Ezra!” from inside the portal, but he could only watch in mute horror and grief as the scene played out. From this angle, he could see Ezra’s arms shaking with exertion, and while he couldn’t feel the heat of the fire, he could barely hear anything over its roar.

Behind him, Depa rested her hand on his shoulder. “Is that him?”

Kanan nodded as Ezra turned slightly to stop the earlier Kanan from charging straight into the fire. “I understand now. Why you told me to run. I didn’t before, but… it should have been me, not him. Not Ezra.”

“Can’t you pull him out? Like you pulled me out?”

He shook his head. “If I do, then Hera, Sabine, and I die, and I won’t have been here to pull him out. He found the moment he was needed, and he chose to sacrifice himself for us. I have to respect that choice.” Distantly, he realized that this was exactly what Ahsoka had been trying to tell him all those years ago on Atollon, when they’d thought that Ezra was dead. He hadn’t taken her words to heart, then , but now…  _ Huh. Looks like you had something to teach me for a change, kid,  _ he thought sadly.

Depa gently wrapped her arm around Kanan’s shoulders as best she could, given how much taller he was, silently supporting him as he felt the tears roll down his face. Inside the portal, Ezra shoved Kanan back into the transport, and he felt Depa squeeze his shoulders comfortingly. “I’m proud of you,” she said softly, and he almost couldn’t hear her over the sound of the explosion booming out as Ezra shoved the transport away.

Kanan watched mutely as the flames curled around his son, simultaneously wanting to turn away and not wanting to tear his eyes off of Ezra for a second. But as the flames blocked Ezra from the earlier version of Kanan’s line of sight, the present version realized that Ezra was holding a bubble around himself. He was trembling, eyes closed as he seemed to make peace with his choice. Then, right as he was about to let the bubble go, Kanan realized why he’d held it in the first place.

Ezra had been to the World Between Worlds. He knew how it worked. He had to have known that if he got Kanan, Hera, and Sabine away and then held on for  _ just another few seconds,  _ then Kanan could save him. This wouldn’t be Malachor all over again. This was how they both made it  _ right. _

Kanan surged forward, grabbing Ezra’s shoulders just before the fire closed around him and pulling him quickly through the portal. The backlash from the portal sent the two of them flying, and as Kanan’s head slammed into the walkway, he let the darkness overtake his vision.

It cleared after a minute. Kanan hauled himself up into a sitting position, holding one hand to his head as if the pressure would ease the throbbing ache that had built up there. Head injuries were not fun, and he had a nasty tendency to acquire them. Zeb, Sabine and Ezra were always teasing him about it.

_ Ezra. _

Looking up quickly-- and regretting it when his vision tunneled and his headache doubled in intensity-- Kanan gaped at the figure in front of him. Ezra was on his knees, panting and staring at his hands, probably marveling at the fact that he could see them again. Depa was right behind him, soothingly rubbing his back, but she was eyeing Kanan to make sure he was alright.

Easing himself to his feet, Kanan whispered, “Ezra?”

Ezra whipped his head up, stared at Kanan for a minute, then practically launched himself into Kanan’s arms, choking a laugh. Kanan wrapped his arms firmly around him, holding him as close as he possibly could. He was laughing, too-- or maybe he was crying-- or maybe he was doing both at the same time, he honestly couldn’t tell at that moment, and he didn’t care. All he cared about was the fact that Ezra was here, alive, if a little singed. He murmured reassurances between hiccuping sobs and laughs, running his hands through Ezra’s ridiculously long hair.

Finally, he managed to get ahold of himself long enough to say, “You really need a haircut, kid.”

Ezra barked a laugh, pulling away from Kanan enough to meet his eyes, his own the beautiful jewel-toned blue that they were supposed to be. He’d been crying too, apparently. “I’ll get one when you do, Dad.”

Behind Ezra, Depa stiffened, her expression going from surprised to outright shocked. Kanan ignored her in favor of tossling Ezra’s hair. “Yeah, that’ll happen. You saw my last haircut; pretty much no one liked it.”

“Because you did it yourself,” Ezra retorted, ducking out from under Kanan’s hand. As he turned, he seemed to catch sight of Depa, and straightened, eyes going wide in surprise. 

Kanan stepped forward, resting one hand on Ezra’s shoulder. Normally he did that to comfort Ezra, but this time, he needed the tangible proof that Ezra was really here. “Ezra, this is Master Depa Billaba. Depa, my former Padawan, Ezra Bridger.”

Ezra glanced back at Kanan in shock, but it was Depa who spoke. “Former?” She sounded surprised, but Kanan just nodded. 

“I knighted him.”

Ezra grinned. “It’s nice to meet you, Master Billaba. Kanan’s told me a lot about you. Good things, I promise!” he added hurriedly, and Depa chuckled.

“Well, I can see why you’re Caleb’s Padawan. You remind me a lot of him.”

Ezra beamed with pride, and opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by an oily voice echoing from the portal behind them. “Well, this is a surprise.”

The three of them turned quickly, staring in horror at the hooded figure who was only barely illuminated by the brazier of blue flames next to him. The Emperor bared his crooked yellow teeth in a sinister grin. “Kanan Jarrus, Depa Billaba, and Ezra Bridger-- mine at last!”

They ran. Of course they ran. All of them were injured or exhausted or both, so they were in no shape to try to fight off the columns of blue flame the Emperor threw at them. They barely made it to the portal before the flames reached them, and Kanan grabbed both Ezra and Depa as he jumped through.

They landed hard, rolling to come to a stop at the feet of Hera, Zeb, and Sabine, who were all frozen in shock. Blasterfire from behind them forced them out of their stupor, though, and as Hera pulled Ezra to his feet, holding him close, and Sabine hauled Depa up, Kanan let Zeb pull him upright as well.

“How the hell--” Hera started to ask, but was cut off as a blasterbolt passed a little too close to her head.

Kanan just shook his head, leaning against Zeb for support. “Later. We need to close the portal.”

Ezra nodded. “The Son. We need to activate the Son.”

Sabine was staring at him, obviously wanting to know how the kriffing hell he’d survived that, but Kanan could see her visibly push the questions out of her mind. “Right.”

They moved quickly, ducking as the swarms of troopers opened fire, and as they scrambled to take cover behind the boulders in front of the Temple painting, a drill-- driven by Chopper-- began plowing away the stormtroopers. With that threat mostly taken care of, Kanan looked up at the menacing figure of the Son. A hand on his arm made him turn to meet Ezra’s eyes, and they shared a nod before Kanan gestured to Zeb, who carefully lifted him onto his shoulders. As he braced himself against the wall, Kanan felt Ezra lend him his strength through their bond. A moment later, another rush of power flooded through him as Depa realized what he was doing.

Acting on instinct, Kanan made a fist and rested it against the painted image of the Son’s hand. Focusing on his anger at the Empire for trying to shatter his family, at himself for repeatedly failing to protect them, his grief at losing Ezra, his fear that he would lose more of his family and he wouldn’t get them back, he pushed the wave of dark emotions into the painting, giving it everything he had. He tightened his fist, welcoming the pain as his fingernails dug into his palms through his gloves, and pushed that into the mural as well. 

Something in the stone shifted and shuddered. He opened his eyes to see the Son’s eyes light up red, and the lines radiating out from his fist were shot through with the same colour. As the painting began to move again, Kanan let the exhaustion overtake him and he collapsed. Zeb must have caught him, because he didn’t hit the ground, but he wasn’t aware of much besides Hera’s voice shouting something urgently, a bright light, and the feeling of being hauled up into a vehicle of some sort. It rumbled underneath him, as someone laid him down. He opened his eyes enough to see Hera’s worried face framed in a bright white light, before he let himself fall unconscious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: in my original plans for this series, Depa showed up exactly nowhere. She just wandered in and I didn't have the heart to make her leave. Besides, if Ezra could save Ahsoka, someone whose death he felt responsible for, Kanan could save one of the people whose death he blamed himself for.  
> I have never read any of the comics or anything, so my characterization of Depa is literally based on other fanfics. Also, I'm aware that the scene where she dies is a little different than canon, but hey--it's fanfiction. It's not supposed to be completely accurate.  
> Anyway, hope you liked it.


	3. Realization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. This is it. The last chapter. Honestly I didn't think I'd ever get this far along publishing it. I can't believe the response this has gotten. Every comment and kudo has been unexpected, because I didn't think what I was writing would interest anyone. So seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for sticking with me through it.

Waking up was a trip and a half. When Kanan opened his eyes to see Master Billaba watching him with concern in his eyes, he was half afraid that he’d time traveled again. Thankfully, Sabine appeared over the Jedi Master’s shoulder, quickly disillusioning him of that notion.

“Good, you’re awake. Hera, Zeb, and Ezra are outside; they didn’t want to overcrowd you. But now that you’re awake, maybe we can get some explanations?” Sabine sounded somewhere between annoyed, confused, and scared, like she wasn’t sure how to feel about the day’s developments.

Kanan nodded slowly as he sat up, massaging his forehead to try to relieve his headache. “Yeah, I’m thinking explanations are gonna take awhile.” He gave Sabine and Depa a shaky grin, letting his eyes linger on his former Master for a beat longer than on Sabine. 

The two helped him clamber down from the drill. As they approached the others, Kanan saw Hera and Zeb watching as Ezra slowly moved through a series of katas, his green lightsaber faint in the haze of the dawn. Without turning to look at him, Hera said, “He’s been doing this since we stopped. He won’t tell us what happened or how he’s alive.”

Kanan sighed. “He was probably waiting for me so I could explain what he wasn’t there for.”

“Maybe,” Zeb grumbled before calling out, “Hey, kid! He’s awake!”

Ezra paused in the middle of an exaggeratedly slow block, then straightened and disengaged his lightsaber. As he hooked it to his belt, he turned to grin at the others. ”Coming!”

They all ended up sitting on the frost-covered ground, along the edge of the circle that had marked the approach to the Temple. Ezra leaned against Zeb, holding Sabine's hand, and Kanan let Hera rest against him. Chopper was hunkered down next to Depa, eyeing her suspiciously. Everyone else was staring at Kanan, waiting for an explanation.

"I'm gonna warn you now that this is going to sound absolutely insane--" he started off, only to be interrupted by Zeb's guffaw.

"I'm sitting in a circle near where a Jedi Temple just vanished, with two people who were dead just a day ago. Nothing much could top that."

Kanan tried not to smirk. Last time he'd thought something like that, Ezra had dropped the "I'm a time-traveler too" bomb. This one was only slightly less mind blowing. "Well, I'm pretty sure the explanation is a bit more insane than you think, mostly because it includes a bit of time travel."

Ezra snorted. "A bit?"

Kanan met his eyes, the question clear on his face, but out of habit, he passed it through their bond as well. _'You wanna come clean? '_

Ezra pursed his lips slightly. _'M_ _ight as well. I, especially, owe it to them. After Malachor, and now this… I don't wanna keep lying to them.'_

Kanan sighed. "Alright, a lot of time travel. And it starts well before any of you would expect.”

**_______**

“So, let me get this straight,” Zeb said, ears flat across his skull as he looked back and forth between Ezra and Kanan. “You’re from the future.”

“Alternate timeline,” Ezra corrected.

Zeb ignored him. “You’ve been changing things for the better, because somehow last time around was _worse_.” At Kanan’s nod, he continued. “And you decided for some reason not to tell any of us.”

“Or each other, for the first year or two,” Ezra added cheerfully.

Hera was staring at Ezra, dumbfounded. After a moment, she shook her head. “You’re never allowed outside again. When you aren’t accidentally faking your death, you’re kriffing _time-traveling .”_

Ezra rolled his eyes at her, but he was grinning as he said, “It’s not _my_ fault, these things just sort of… happen.”

Kanan snorted. “Yeah, you’re still not allowed outside. Grounded, indefinitely,” he teased.

Ezra groaned. “Dad! Why do you always take her side?”

Sabine giggled, still staring at Ezra like she couldn’t believe he was here. Actually, she probably couldn’t. She leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder, like she was afraid he’d disappear if she stopped making physical contact. “You know how we keep comparing you to a Loth-cat? If they have nine lives, I’m pretty sure your on life number four.”

Ezra shot Kanan and Hera a look. “See? I’ve got five lives left! I’m perfectly safe.” As the others laughed, he turned back to his sister, running a hand through her brunette and purple hair. “By the way, ‘Bine, I like your hair.”

Sabine beamed at that, joy flashing across her face. “Thanks. I was actually thinking of changing it again soon.”

Ezra grinned. “I’d love to see what you do with it.”

Kanan smiled as he watched his kids. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Depa shift slightly and immediately, guilt swept through him. She probably had no idea what was going on. Given that she had no context for the stories they had told, or the missions they had mentioned, the slightly lost look on her was understandable. Gently, he sent an inquiry through their bond, a sort of silent ‘ _are you okay?’_ Fragile as their newly-restored bond was, Depa felt it, and sent a quick smile Kanan’s way.

“I’m fine, Caleb. But thank you for your concern.”

Ezra smacked his forehead. “Sorry, Master Billaba. I guess we kind of left you out of the conversation, didn’t we?”

“From what I could see-- and from what I heard-- I believe you can be forgiven for focusing on your family instead,” Depa said kindly.

“Yeah,” Ezra shifted uncomfortably, “but you’re Kanan’s Master, so you’re, like, our grandmother.”

Kanan stuttered a protest. “Woah, woah, Ezra, she’s your Grand _master_. Maybe ask and see if she’s comfortable being called a grandmother before you just blurt it out.”

As Ezra sheepishly rubbed the back of his head, Zeb chuckled. “Well, since these knuckleheads don’t have the manners to introduce themselves, I will. I’m Garazeb Orrelios, but I go by Zeb. This one here’s Sabine, and I’m pretty sure you’ve met Ezra.”

Depa nodded, smiling pleasantly at the Lasat. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

After a moment of silence, Sabine said, “Well, if you don’t have anymore bombshells to drop, I’m going to take a moment to, um, process all of--” she gestured vaguely at the circle they were sitting in “--this.”

“Good idea,” Zeb grumbled. “We probably need to head back to base anyway. The Empire might send someone out here soon, and Ryder’ll be waiting to know how it went.”

Ezra nodded and stood, stretching like a Loth-cat as he did before heading back toward the drill. Halfway there, he paused, then turned around with an impish grin on his face. “I just realized, I’m the only one with a lightsaber right now.”

Depa looked at Kanan, who winced slightly at the unspoken reprimand in her eyes. “In my defence, I had to get Hera out of Capital City. And I thought I was about to die, so it wouldn’t matter.”

“Caleb…” Depa sighed, exasperated. “The weapon of a Jedi--”

“Is his life, I know, I know. Force, aren’t I a little old to be scolded?”

“Apparently not.” Depa said with a wry grin. Standing carefully, still favoring her side, she turned to Hera with a softer smile. “I didn’t get your name earlier, I'm afraid.”

“Hera Jarrus-Syndulla,” the Twi’lek pilot said as she shook the Jedi Master’s proffered hand.

Depa’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Jarrus?” She gave Kanan a very specific _look_ , and he tensed slightly, expecting a reprimand for getting attached, but instead Depa just smiled smugly. “You’re a very lucky man, Caleb.”

“Don’t I know it,” he muttered before he realized what he said.

Sabine chuckled. “You old softie.” She ducked as he swatted at her head, giggling slightly before chasing after Ezra, who had already climbed into the drill, and Zeb, who wasn’t far behind.

Chopper warbled something in binary, extending a manipulator to Depa in a ‘follow me’ gesture. Hera nodded at the Jedi Master. “He wants to brief you on the last eighteen years. This was probably all very confusing for you, given that you had no context for any of it.”

Depa smiled gratefully. “Thank you, Hera. And thank you, little droid. I didn’t get your designation…” Depa’s voice faded slightly as she and Chopper made their way back to the drill.

Hera sighed, tucking herself under Kanan’s chin with a contented smile on her face as she stared at the drill. Kanan followed her gaze, reveling in the familiar signatures inside the vehicle. Against all odds, his little family was safe and whole. Though, he thought as he extended his senses enough to feel the fragile light inside Hera, it was about to get a little bigger.

Hera’s voice cut through his thoughts. “We can do it.” Kanan hummed slightly, wordlessly asking her what she meant as she pulled away slightly. “That life we wanted to build? The one we never talked about? We can build it. We’re so close to winning now, it won’t be long before the Empire’s gone. We can settle down here, have an actual house. Make a room for the baby… I could open a flight school. You, Ezra, and Depa could build a sanctuary for Force-sensitives, rebuild the Order. Maybe get Ahsoka and Masters Kenobi and Yoda to help. Between Zeb and Sabine, we can train the people to help us keep the Empire off of Lothal. We can do it.”

Kanan met her eyes. “Would you be happy with that? The Rebellion…”

Hera huffed slightly, smiling sadly. “I feel like I’ve done my part for the Rebellion. Right now, I want to rest, keep my family together for a little bit longer. We… we almost lost it all, Kanan. I can’t do that again. We’ve already lost so much; if this war costs us any more, I don’t think we’ll survive it. We’ve been given so many second chances, I don’t know if we’ll get another. So I’m going to take this chance to get out, make sure our child doesn’t grow up in a warzone, keep Sabine and Ezra from dying young. If you want to keep fighting, I understand but…”

“Hey,” Kanan said softly. “I’m staying right here. We all are; we’re not going anywhere.”

Hera’s smile become slightly watery and she blinked hard, looking away. With a soft smile, he pulled her close again, gently resting his chin between her lekku.

She was right, of course. This war had almost taken everything from them, multiple times. He’d lost track of how many prayers he’d sent to the Force, begging for his family to make it home safe, for them to be okay, for them to make it out alive. He’d lost track of how many times he’d felt the awful cold feeling in his chest when he was sure that Zeb or Sabine or Hera or Ezra had been killed. The only thing he hadn’t lost track of was how many friends and family they’d lost along the way. 

But the galaxy hadn’t just taken. It had given, too. It had given Kanan and Ezra the chance to fix all their mistakes. It had given Ezra his sight back. It had given the Spectres a family, who they could always rely on, who would support them, even in the heartbeats they were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally wrote out the conversation where they told them about the changes they made, but it dragged on and basically just rehashed the entire series. While there were some funny moments, I decided to cut it.  
> Thank you so much for reading! I'll probably post all the one-shots I have all at once--probably by the weekend, but no promises. It might very well be sooner.

**Author's Note:**

> So, yeah, I did that again. Sorry.   
> It'll get better.


End file.
